When Donna Grammatica was 5 years old, her 19-year-old aunt Sara, who she called “Sasa,” died after an accident resulting from drunk driving.

As a freshman at Syracuse University, Grammatica got a tattoo of a purple butterfly with the words “Aunt Sasa” to honor the woman who left such a large impact on her.

“She was like a second mom,” said Grammatica, who’s now a senior. “I don’t remember much about her, but I know that I was her entire life. She was just always there for me.”

Sara was drinking and not wearing a seatbelt at the time of the accident. Because of the incident, Grammatica is an advocate of not drinking and driving and of wearing a seatbelt.

Grammatica said people understand the dangers of drinking and driving, but unless someone has, like her, lost a loved one or had a loved one involved in a harmful accident, they can’t fully grasp its effect.

Grammatica added that she strongly believes one drink is one too many and just not worth it.

“Everyone says, ‘Oh, I’ll be fine. I’m not that bad, as long as I focus,’ but that’s not true,” she said. “As much as you want to think that you’re fine to drive, you’re not.”

Besides being a passionate advocate for safe driving, Grammatica feels like her aunt’s death has taught her a lot about life.

“I wish it didn’t happen, but I think that I live my life in such a different way because of it,” she said. “I think we just need to be aware that our life is worth so much more than we take for granted.”

Grammatica said she always knew she wanted a tattoo, but it would need to be meaningful. She chose a purple butterfly because it was her aunt’s favorite color and animal. It serves as a reminder that she is strong and that she should be the best version of herself.

Despite the amount of time that has passed since her aunt’s death, Grammatica and her family still cope with Sara’s death to this day. They try to accept what happened rather than dwell on what could’ve been.

On her aunt’s birthday, Grammatica and her mother bake a cake in celebration of the life she lived and the legacy she’s left behind.

“One of the things that’s always kept me going is that I feel like I live my life partially for her because she didn’t get to,” Grammatica said. “I was so important to her that she wouldn’t want me to be upset. She would want me to the best person I can be, which is what I’m trying to be.”

Whenever Grammatica faces an obstacle, she looks to her tattoo for strength.

“Even when things are bad, I just remember that I’m strong enough to go through them,” she said. “Because of her and for her.”

Published on October 23, 2017 at 10:01 pm

Contact Raven: rarentas@syr.edu